Do you think if I dyed my hair brown, people would stop treating me like a brainless blonde bimbo? That's the question of the day.
I've never been one to say things like that, but sometimes I guess certain things just have to be said. Now, I am in no way, shape, or form attempting to associate myself with the likes of actual brainless blonde bimbos (such as the "Girls Next Door"). I have never once claimed to be a sexy supermodel with the IQ of a peanut, and I would appreciate it if you didn't lump me into this horrendous category.
All I'm trying to say is that I'm not a total jackass. Don't treat me like one. I'm not going to get on a soapbox and use the old, "I graduated from a great college, I've acheived this or that in my career" bullshit. I'm simply saying that I'm not a fucking moron. So don't treat me like one or you'll get punched in the face. Not slapped, punched. Only bitches slap.
love,
me
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Sunday, August 26, 2007
Albinos, Albanians, and You: 10 Things I've Learned This Summer.
My friends,With summer all-to-quickly coming to end, I thought I'd share some things with you.
These are the top 10 things I've learned this summer, in no particular order.
1. Don't go on a date with someone who doesn't speak english. It's difficult.
2. Don't believe someone just because they are supposed to be an "expert" on something. Do your own research and form your own opinions. (That goes out to YOU, Sirius Satellite Radio staff!)
3. Don't take your cell phone in the bathtub with you. Cell phone + water = a very bad experience.
4. Shit happens, deal with it. Chances are, that shit happened for a reason, and if you don't move on, you'll never know what that reason is.
5. Don't do 71 mph in a 55 mph zone. You WILL get pulled over.
6. Don't forget to wear sunscreen. And if your fair skinned, use SPF 260, or else you'll burst into flames when sitting on the beach.
7. Kanye West has no skills as a lyricist.
8. Don't drive your car into things. Curbs are there for a reason.
9. Don't go to the bar with your parents. You could get wasted and end up dropping the F bomb in front of your mom.
10. If you give someone of the opposite sex your phone number and they don't call you, don't waste time wondering why they didn't call. They're just not that into you. Or maybe they just don't speak english....
I hope everyone had a great summer. Fall, here we come!
These are the top 10 things I've learned this summer, in no particular order.
1. Don't go on a date with someone who doesn't speak english. It's difficult.
2. Don't believe someone just because they are supposed to be an "expert" on something. Do your own research and form your own opinions. (That goes out to YOU, Sirius Satellite Radio staff!)
3. Don't take your cell phone in the bathtub with you. Cell phone + water = a very bad experience.
4. Shit happens, deal with it. Chances are, that shit happened for a reason, and if you don't move on, you'll never know what that reason is.
5. Don't do 71 mph in a 55 mph zone. You WILL get pulled over.
6. Don't forget to wear sunscreen. And if your fair skinned, use SPF 260, or else you'll burst into flames when sitting on the beach.
7. Kanye West has no skills as a lyricist.
8. Don't drive your car into things. Curbs are there for a reason.
9. Don't go to the bar with your parents. You could get wasted and end up dropping the F bomb in front of your mom.
10. If you give someone of the opposite sex your phone number and they don't call you, don't waste time wondering why they didn't call. They're just not that into you. Or maybe they just don't speak english....
I hope everyone had a great summer. Fall, here we come!
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