The rainbow made me do it.

Why is there a man in a white jacket at my front door, politely forcing me to get into the big white van? Cause I'm nuttier than a fruitcake, that's why! He probably saw me get into a fight with that white butterfly on Tuesday. (But seriously, that butterfly shouldn't have been following me around like that.) Or maybe it's because I took a bath in acetone yesterday (but I really wanted to get those fake nails off!) Whatever the reason, they're coming for me, and I promise to go quietly and without incident.

Physically, I'm feeling better (minus the wrinkly skin cause by the acetone). This stupid cold is just about gone, and I can now breathe without hacking up a lung or two. I ripped another contact, so I walked around for a day with one good eyeball. It reminded me of old times, when I did EVERYTHING with one contact in.... school dances, playing badminton (pretty hard with one eye), walking down the runway during my short modeling stint (believe it or not, this was harder than a one eyed badminton tournament). I never tripped, though. Don't even ask me to do a one eyed catwalk now, OR a two eyed catwalk. I'd be on the floor with a broken leg in three seconds. I've turned into such a klutz, even walking is asking too much. Although.... I DID make breakfast for my family on Sunday without burning anything, which is a HUGE deal, if you didnt know. And might I add, it was very good, if I DO say so myself. Maybe I'll do it more often... well, let's not push it. Start small, ya know?

On another note, I went to the mall with my mom today, which is ALWAYS an adventure. I brought her along for my "spring clothes shopping extravaganza", and it was very entertaining. I like bringing my mom with me places, she has a tendency to say things in stores that people shouldn't say out loud, and it's hilarious. Today, for instance, I was picking out clothes to try on, and I'm admiring a shirt thats on one of the "torso" models. She walks right over and says in a pretty loud voice, "Eww, that's just ugly." I laughed so hard I just about cried. Once I got into the fitting room, I opened the door to show her my outfit. She said she liked it, and she wanted to know how much it was. She looked at the price tag and said, "WOW! You can get that for WAY cheaper at Target." It was priceless. In the end, I took about half of the store into the dressing room with me, and came out with 4 nice pieces that fit my outfit criterita:

1. You must fit my awkwardly shaped body.

2. You must be in my price range.

3. You MUST look cute on me.

So all in all, I'm glad I went, and I'm glad my mom came with me. AND, I saved 20% off my final purchase since I shop there a lot.... WAY too much, actually. And, as an added bonus, we saw an AWESOME rainbow on the way home from the mall, and I almost drove off the road while trying to take a picture of it. I almost caused a 15 car pile up on 422, seriously. But it was so pretty..... If the picture actually comes out, I'll put it up so everyone can bask in it's beauty, and NOT cause a 15 car pile up while doing so.

On to my next topic.... of COURSE my vacation plans wouldn't run smoothly. Why would they? I would love to go on a cruise.... but with people dying and ship fires and food poisoning, maybe I'll pass. With MY luck, I'd get drunk and fall overboard. And instead of dying, a police boat would come by and pick me up and I'd get arrested for being drunk in the ocean. It's probably a felony or some crap.

Juggalos, listen. The Gathering is at my house this year. Screw Michigan. Nobody wanted to go there anyway.

Full moon tonight! Watch out for those crazies! I'll be safely tucked away in my little asylum I call home, in my straightjacket.